The Light in the Dark Nights
by AndreaTWDC
Summary: This is a story dedicated to Rick and Andrea's friendship, love story, and the life they share together.
1. These Hands Will Guide You

Andrea heard his scream almost instantly. Although she was fixing a jam in her prized rifle, she instantly threw it aside and reached for her knife as she took off. _Carl needed her help. _ Of course she wasn't the only person in the camp awake this early, and she soon felt Rick and Glenn fast on her heels, but Andrea was faster. Her motherly instincts were going wild as the adrenaline coursed through her veins. She just needed to get there and _protect _him because that was what she did. Protect others. It only took her a millisecond to pinpoint where Carl was struggling as she heard him. The poor ten year old boy had been through too much. It didn't seem fair that one thing after another kept billowing down on the Grimes family. Her eyes widened in disbelief as she saw Carl on the ground and one of the monsters hovering over him. This one was especially decrepit as the skin hung loosely from its arms and back. Were they getting _worse _as in more _monstrous_? Andrea took a moment to wonder as she came over and forcefully pushed the walker from Carl. The snarling monster stumbled back from the force and Andrea instantly put her body between the walker and Carl. "Don't you _touch _ him." Andrea growled as she narrowed her eyes at the beast. She couldn't help her response, especially after the recent loss of her own sons Ben and Billy. They would not lose another child. No more dying if Andrea had a hand at it. She raised her knife with an utter gleam of hate in her eyes as she savagely ran to the walker. Her prey weakly reached out to grab her, but Andrea was smarter, stronger. She plunged her knife in the skull of the walker and he immediately went limp, sliding down. Her work was clean as she retracted the knife, minimal blood spatter tainted her clothes, but she wasn't done yet. Rick and Glenn still hadn't arrived and she didn't want Carl to see her be who she really was: a ruthless killer, or that's what she thought. She could still hear Carl as he sat on the ground and she thought she heard him crying. Andrea's killing instinct was instantly wavered away as she swiveled back to face the small boy, his tiny hat tossed aside in his fight. Andrea's soft blue eyes searched for Carl's as she walked over and knelt by him, instantly wrapping her arms around him and pulling him into her lap. She stroked back his hair and kissed the top of his head. "It's okay… I'm here… I won't let them hurt you, Carl. Don't worry." Andrea held the crying boy tightly to her chest as Rick and Glenn appeared. She feared they may have heard her private words with Carl. She looked up and of course her eyes found Rick's as he ran over to them, picking up that Sheriff's hat. Much to Andrea's surprise, instead of just holding Carl, he wrapped his arms around both of them, and the action nearly knocked Andrea off of her feet. Well it would have if she was standing. She moved closer to Rick so that Carl was sandwiched between them as she stroked back Carl's hair. "It's okay… Daddy's here now Carl." Andrea spoke softly and gently to Carl about his father yet he still clung to her. It kind of hurt Andrea's heart to think that Carl had no mother, and no matter how good Rick was as a dad, which of course he was amazing, Carl needed a mother. He needed someone to hold him to her chest after a walker attacked or when the night's got too scary, and Andrea wanted to be that for him. She swallowed at what her own words were insinuating as she pulled away and bounced Carl up into her arms. "Come on. Let's get back to camp before more come." Andrea directed her words at Rick and Glenn as she began quietly walking, Rick on her right side, Glenn on her left as if they were protecting her and the precious cargo that was Carl Grimes.

When they arrived back at the camp, Andrea tried to set Carl down, but he still clung to her as if she would somehow disappear. Ironically enough, Carl was too providing her comfort, and she didn't mind it. It had only been a few days, so she was of course still mourning the loss of Dale… Her sons passing were only the week before. She had found herself pushing on despite the fact that Andrea just wanted to crumble apart from all of her loss. She had seen Ben and his tiny, blood drenched hands hovering over his brother Billy who was surely _dead_ in any standard of the old world, but not here. Here, he was in the state of death before re-animation and it took all the skill and maneuver to lower him away from the scene for her to say goodbye to Billy. She wanted to end his life officially, but Abraham had volunteered kindly enough. She merely sat with Dale, expecting him to be there for her forever. She was sadly disappointed when Dale wasn't there for her forever. He grew even more distant to her at the loss of their sons, but their separation didn't necessarily start there. Upon Andrea disobeying Dale's wishes, an invisible force placated it's way between them. When she returned to the prison to help, something changed between her and Dale, but something also changed between her and Rick. Without Andrea's help, perhaps none of them would have survived, but she gave them the chance to. She gave them the window to fight, and quite frankly survive another day. Rick learned once again how much he could always rely on Andrea. She was his supporting force. It wasn't the first time she had found Rick fighting by her side. They had fought from the moment Shane taught her how to shoot as she much preferred protecting the others and doing, "The man's work," than sitting around and cooking or doing laundry. Andrea helped Rick clear the prison with Tyreese, shooting by his side even when the future seemed dim and hopeless. Andrea protected the others just like Rick had. They were almost like an inseparable pair. Many times they didn't even say thank you as it was a silent communication between them. She would find him staring at her though, like she often did him, and in a weird way it gave her a reassurance that he would always have her back. Rick saved her life from the psychopathic Thomas, coming in at just the right moment to her rescue… She fought along him with the Hunters who murdered Dale, he, protecting Dale long enough to give her that final goodbye. Andrea never thanked him for that, and as she held a now sleeping Carl to her chest, she agreed she would. Andrea sighed as she walked to where she knew Rick's tent was, hoping he was nowhere to be found. She carefully laid Carl down after disentangling him from her. He grumbled some tired words for her not to go. She knew he would be asleep soon, so she planted a kiss on his forehead and lightly held his hand so it was easy to untangle later as she watched him drift to sleep, comforted by her presence. Andrea kissed Carl one more time before she carefully left Rick's tent. She sighed with relief when she didn't see him, or anyone really, but then she felt a pang. Where was he? Rick was never this far from Carl…

Andrea swallowed as she recovered her bearings and walked the barriers of the camp, Rick nowhere in sight. Andrea swallowed as she tried to think where he would be. Sometimes she would find Rick in small, private places either crying or curled up and looking blankly ahead. Knowing that he wouldn't leave Carl helped her search as she walked over to the van they had been traveling in. It still had most of their supply. Andrea opened the back and the horror of Ben's slaughter flashed before her eyes for a moment before her wide, alarmed eyes set on Rick. He was _crying, _which nearly sawed Andrea's heart in half as she ducked in the van and shut the door. She crawled through the obstacle course Rick had some how maneuvered and focused her eyes on him, speaking softly. "Hey….Carl's okay Rick…. I just put him to bed." Rick still remained crying and Andrea could not tolerate it a second longer. She couldn't stand to see her best friend like that. She moved in the small opening between his legs and reached to his face to wipe his tears with her small, soft hands. "He's okay…" She repeated over and over as she continually wiped Rick's tears. It almost seemed as if he if he almost wasn't hearing her or seeing her. After what seemed like an eternity, Rick's determined brown eyes locked with Andrea's blue ones. "You saved my son's life…. I can't thank you enough." Andrea nodded a tiny bit in understanding and backed up to give Rick his personal space. She hit into an extremely hard box and it caused her to yelp, but she quickly recovered. Rick's eyes darted with concern as he leaned to gently guide her body from the dangers of that box. "Are you okay?" Andrea nodded a tiny bit as she rubbed her back. Rick sighed with relief and leaned back against the van, exasperated. "Michonne's on watch, I think I might stay with her. You should get to bed." Andrea spoke softly, gently to Rick as she carefully began to maneuver from the maze. Rick shook his head no as he caught Andrea's wrist. "Come stay with Carl and I." Andrea nodded a tiny bit in understanding, a smile forming on her lips as she left the van and waited for Rick. She reached one of her hands to Rick to help him get out and the bin of blankets fell entirely over him. Andrea let out a slight laugh as she let go of his hand and walked to the blankets to help him. She pulled the warm fleece off of Rick first before she absentmindedly began folding, almost methodically. She barely even noticed Rick beside her, watching her, as folding was nearly an impossible task without his right hand. Once Andrea finished she nodded towards him and directed her attention to the tent as they slowly began walking.

Andrea truthfully didn't know what to expect as she walked beside Rick. Nothing romantic, she knew that. Rick very clearly wasn't interested in that. Or that's what Andrea thought. She ducked in the tent first, followed by him. She then returned to hold the two pieces of tent closed as Rick easily zipped out the cold. There goes their teamwork again. Andrea sighed some as she realized she didn't bring her sleeping bag, blankets, or pillow. Rick was already moving back to lay down by Carl, but his first job was Andrea's comfort. He passed his sleeping things to her and Andrea silently shook her head no. He pushed them on her and she took them, not wanting to argue in front of Carl. Andrea sighed as she unzipped Rick's sleeping bag and snuggled inside, next to Carl. She barely noticed that Rick was laying down, his arm going protectively around Carl. Andrea laid close to Carl as well and her arm too went around him. It was the strangest sensation for her, but Andrea actually _fell asleep easily_ between the smell of Rick's sleeping bag and her arm on Carl, sleep was imminent. The thing Andrea didn't know was Rick too was already half asleep, simply comforted by Andrea's presence. If she was here in an arm's length reach, she was safe.

Andrea and Rick both slept through the entire night, their arms around Carl. Their hands had however found each other too as they rested on Carl. Andrea's fingers were locked tightly with Rick's which rested upon Carl. She woke up first from the sun shining through the tent. She saw their hands and instantly loosened her fingers in his. What Rick never knew, wouldn't hurt him. Andrea sighed as she brushed a kiss quickly on Carl's forehead and left the tent as quietly as possible, Rick snoring loudly as she did so, letting her know he was asleep and at rest, much to her happiness.


	2. Knock Before You Enter

As soon as Andrea walked into the crisp morning air, she knew it would be a painful day. The crystalline shining on the grass on a cool morning awoke her to reality. It really was an odd feeling being cold… and Andrea hated it. Growing up in Jacksonville taught her that anything below fifty degrees was bad. She laughed at the thought of what a winter would be like in Washington, DC. What it would be like to be in _snow, _dare she say it. The thought literally chilled her to the bone. As she walk over to the burned out fire pit, Andrea immediately set to work gathering her tinder. She scowled as she saw that they were out of wood and she immediately brushed her hands on her jeans, ready to depart into the woods. She first walked to get her rifle. It was still laying on the ground from yesterday when she had tossed it aside. Andrea grimaced as she cleared the chamber again and began viscously stabbing her finger inside for that one stubborn bullet. Little to her knowledge she had an audience. Abraham was watching her with one of his infamous smirks. "Let me see it Andrea." Andrea clutched her "baby" closer. "No, I've got it. No problems here." Abraham shook his head, the smirk remaining and she was suddenly tempted to hit him in the head with the butt of her rifle _again. _He sighed at her response as if the conversation now bored him. She passed him the rifle and with one swift hand motion later, it was ready to go. "Thanks, Abraham." Andrea swallowed her pride in that moment as she took it back and began inserting the rounds inside the chambers. He nodded and watched her, curiously. "Where the hell are you going?" Abraham raised an eyebrow as Andrea was near the trees again. Andrea sighed and explained, "We need firewood. I wasn't going to go far… Just head in, get some sticks and come back." Abraham sighed and flexed his arms, "I'm coming with you." Andrea quickly shook her head no, "Why?" Abraham huffed at her never ending questions. Rosita was never like this, she just accepted everything he said. "Well maybe because we don't fucking need any more people dying… And no fucking offense, but the last thing we need is you fucking killing yourself or something cause then he'd /lose his mind./" Andrea raised an eyebrow at him as she began walking, her hand going to her hip to check for her knife. "Who are you talking about? Dale's gone Abraham." Abraham chuckled dryly as he looked at her, "You really think that's who I'm talking about. Damn Andrea… I thought you were a lawyer, use your head." Abraham shot her an "I can't believe she doesn't realize he loves her look." Andrea shrugged as they delved deeper into the trees. She already had a small bundle of sticks, Abraham two logs. She tried to change the subject, "How much farther to Washington?" Abraham sighed and spoke up, "Not too long. Thank God." He quickly looked away as Andrea tried to help the flow of their awkward conversation. "Why did you join our group? Wouldn't it have been easier with less people?" Abraham shook his head no as he tried to think of the right words, "Safety in numbers… Right? Besides, Eugene can't shoot for shit and Rosita… Well she's getting better, but she's still not there yet. Your group is strong. More for protection than anything." Andrea swallowed at his words. Wasn't that what it all came down to? Who or what could provide you the most protection. She thought about when she felt most safe, her mind going back to warm summer days with Amy at her side. /Amy/, it even hurt to think about her lost sister. Her one job was failed with her: protect Amy. She died because of Andrea. Andrea remained silent the rest of their scavenging walk, not that Abraham minded as silence often suited him. She couldn't help but think there was something wrong with her as she thought about how safe she felt last night… Safe, secure with Carl and Rick at her side. She tried not to over think it, but he asked her to come… Did he not? What did that mean? Was it about Carl? About their friendship? Or something more? She couldn't shake her nervous feeling as she arrived at the camp with Abraham again. Rick instantly shot her a look as if he was worried about her. She nodded a tiny bit and sighed. Could she tell him not to look at her? Was that actually a thing to say, "Hey…so I know we spend 75% of our day together, but can you stop looking at me because well…. sometimes I feel like there's something more and I know neither of us will admit it because we are too damned stubborn…" Andrea ducked her head as she walked to the pit and began building the fire. She barely raised her head from the project as she finally struck the rock in just the right way. She smiled, feeling accomplished at her task. She rubbed her hands for warmth as Carl walked over to her and sat down.

"Hey Andrea." Carl spoke softly as he adjusted his infamous hat. Andrea tilted her head to him with a genuine smile as she playfully pushed down the rim of the hat. "Hey kiddo. How did you sleep?" Carl suddenly crawled into her lap, taking her by surprise as he wrapped his tiny arms around her. She soon draped her arms around him in return. "Good. Did you stay with me like you promised?" Andrea nodded, thrilled now that Rick had invited her back, even if it was just to make Carl happy and at ease. She kissed Carl's forehead as she held him. "Of course I did… Hey, I've got an idea… Why don't you go get your father and see if we can take a day off of travel to help teach you how to shoot?" Carl's toothy grin raised his cheeks as he hugged Andrea and ran off, calling loudly for Rick. She hoped he wouldn't be mad at her. After all, she basically promised the kid something without even mentioning it to Rick. As she stood from the fire and began preparing breakfast, she felt a familiar hand move to her lower back. Rick was standing right behind her, his hand there, and just his hand.. was making her head spin. She tilted her head back to him and bumped her nose with his. One inch different and their lips surely would have met. Rick spoke low, so only she could hear, his hand still firm on her back. "That was really great of you to offer Carl something he has wanted for so long…. It's a really good idea…. but we don't have the ammunition to waste or a place to go…So I'm sorry." Andrea's face immediately dropped and she moved away from his hand. "Why the hell not? Just a round or two. It will benefit the group later." Rick quickly shook his head as his hand fell to his side. "No Andrea, DC is our priority…. Eugene has the cure." Andrea ducked her head to avoid looking at him. She didn't believe in the cure, but she would damn sure follow Rick anywhere…. He sighed as he backed up and began walking away, "I'm going to go tell Carl." Andrea sighed with relief at that as she moved to the food bins and took out a huge packet of dried fruit. She immediately began getting breakfast portions ready as she waited for Rick and Carl to return. Carl of course was the first one back, running to her.

"Why can't we go?" Carl batted his big brown eyes up at her as he grabbed her around the legs, holding her immobile. Andrea wished she could disappear and take it all back, "We can't go because…because well we don't have enough bullets." Andrea frowned at her crappy explanation as Carl loosened his hold and ran off in a pout.

Andrea shook her head angrily as she kicked a pile of dirt. "Damn it…" Rick frowned at Andrea's words as he sat by the fire, raising his hand to warm it. "He'll be alright." Andrea sighed as she sat down and passed him a fruit packet. She of course opened it first so she wouldn't have to watch him struggle. "You don't understand Rick. I've never disappointed Carl and I don't want to start now. I want to make him happy…" Andrea didn't even notice Rick's eyes on her as she spoke. He was staring at her, and he was being rather blatantly obvious. He cleared his throat and turned away, silently eating his fruit. He didn't know what to say, and neither did she. Instead they carried out the silence with each other, eating their makeshift breakfast. They continued stealing glances, maybe that would be their thing. Secrecy. Andrea frowned at the thought as she wanted everyone to know…. She shook her head as she stood up from the fire and walked away, her words cold now, "Pack up…We need to go." Andrea sighed as she walked off, feeling like Rick had somehow wronged her and led her on. She went to her tent and immediately began packing her bags. She wanted to leave, move, so she could forget everything that had been happening.

Rick of course stared blankly as she left. He found her to be the most confusing and yet beautiful woman he had ever met. He couldn't deny his attraction to her. It was like they were magnets… drawn to each other. He knew his feelings for Andrea although she seemed to not know hers. He sighed in frustration as he stood and walked after her. He was going to be _cold._ Being cold would help him detach from her. He couldn't love her anymore if she didn't love him… and even if she did love him, he couldn't lose her too. He just couldn't tolerate the idea of losing Andrea, a life without her. Rick sauntered over to her tent and ducked inside without giving her the privacy he normal would, because he was angry. He nearly froze, his hands going clammy at the sight of Andrea changing. Although it was just her back, he couldn't deny that he was ready to move her on the ground at that sight. She turned back to him and screamed, beaming her balled up shirt at him, "Get the hell out right now!" Andrea's eyes widened in horror at Rick as she bent over and reached for her clothes. Rick tried to look away, but he couldn't, "I'm sorry!" Rick nervously laughed as he ran from her tent, his pants practically weighing down to his ankles. He still had the balled up shirt, and the thought made him laugh as he threw it outside her tent.

Did he just laugh? Andrea shook her head angrily as she dressed. Rick Grimes saw her practically naked, got a boner, laughed, and left. In what world was that morally acceptable? Sure, it was an apocalypse and everything seemed to go ninety miles an hour but this… This was too far. She screamed in her pillow as she packed, wishing that the past ten minutes would never have happened, but of course, it did, and nothing could change that.


	3. The Mini Savior

Andrea was still furious minutes after Rick had left and she _still _didn't quite know why. She knew it was bound to happen since they were on the road now, but she was hoping it would be Eugene or Glenn. Someone who wouldn't give her that _look. _Her head began to spin as she thought about the way he looked at her. It was like he was devouring her with his eyes and Andrea wasn't quite sure anyone had looked at her that way before. Andrea was so nervous of facing him again after that, and she didn't have any semblance of an idea what to do. To distract herself, she ransacked her tent for new undergarments, quietly peeling off her old ones. She literally almost picked up her gun in that moment, all her hormones being explained as she noticed mother nature gave her Andrea's favorite monthly gift. "Damn you. Fuck." Andrea muttered as she looked around for underwear that weren't ruined yet. She was down to three good pairs now that this pair was ruined. She grabbed one of her beat up pairs and slid them on as she looked for some kind of protection. If there was anything worse than being a girl /before/ the apocalypse, it was being a girl now who needed a God-damned tampon so she didn't bleed through and blame it on the walkers again. Andrea laughed loudly as she internally cursed the invisible force for her troubles. She thought about just how terrible it was sneaking pads and tampons on runs, and she knew she would have to ask to stop today as well. She made a makeshift pad out of an old shirt and groaned as she had cramps. She already knew today would suck more than usual, and she was likely to kill Rick if he so much as breathed in her direction.

Andrea grumbled angrily as she tried to hide her carnage panties, hurrying from her tent with her bags nearly falling out of her arms. She tossed them angrily on the grass as she began to disassemble her tent, Glenn joining her side. "Good morning, Glenn." Andrea tried her best to be cheery for the man whom she considered her brother. Glenn flashed Andrea his wide, bright smile, helping her with the tent. "Hey Andrea. Need any help? Well I started helping anyways, so you don't have much of a choice." Andrea laughed lightly as she helped him, "Well I guess that's true. I guess I'll just have to give you some help later… I actually need one more favor… I need to go to some kind of a store to get supplies, do you think you could talk to Rick about it? I'm kind of avoiding him, and I would be more than happy to go with you." Andrea tried her best to leave out the Rick seeing her nearly naked thing as they finished her tent. "It can be on the way to Washington... " Glenn nodded a tiny bit and placed a hand on her back saying, "Of course Andrea. I'll go talk to him right now." Glenn quickly hurried off to Andrea's grace and thanks, and she sighed with relief, waiting for his return.

Andrea impatiently waited, ripping the grass from the ground. "Why me? Why must I have the worst luck in the entire world. Woe is me!" Andrea moaned dramatically as she laid on the ground, feeling pained and exhausted, wanting a good back massage. "Being a girl is the worst thing ever. Damn you Andrew Harrison." Andrea cursed her dad for making her have the double X Chromosome as she continued abusing the grass, wishing Glenn would come back as soon as possible, preferably with a hand made of chocolate. As Andrea continued her self-pity, Maggie came over as if sensing Andrea's struggle. "I can see you.. are struggling there." Struggling? Andrea was practically dying, but she nodded a little bit. Maggie laughed lightly, "I have some you can use for now. Glenn gets them for me.. Isn't that amazing?" Andrea nodded a bit, but smiled, that sounded like Glenn. Even though Maggie only met kindness, she only seemed to upset Andrea more as she marched to Maggie's tent and then into the trees to change. Why couldn't she have a guy who was willing to secretly steal her tampons? When would she find someone who would just stay with her and hold her as she cried. Andrea frowned at the thought as she walked back to the camp, feeling dejected. Glenn came over with a smile as warm as before. "Rick said okay. Okay that we can go, but he's coming too." Andrea groaned loudly and nudged Glenn, "Tell him he's not allowed. I would rather take /Eugene/." Andrea groaned as Glenn's face contorted some until he realized she was joking with him. Glenn shook his hand and placed a gentle arm on Andrea, "Come on. I'll be there, you'll barely see him. We are going to make a quick run to the Supermarket down the street." Andrea nodded a tiny bit as she walked past Glenn, "You better be right! I better not see him!" Glenn nodded, determinedly as he ran off to warn Maggie. Andrea immediately headed for the van, crossing her arms as she leaned back on it upon arrival, thinking of how the knives in her abdomen seemed to never stop.

It wasn't long before Rick came over to her with Carl at his side. Andrea's face dropped when she saw another possible awkward incident. She shuffled her bag and quickly coated her face with a smile when she saw Carl's toothy grin fade to a frown. "Hey Carl. Good to see you buddy." Andrea turned all her attention to him as she reached to him for a hug. He quickly went into her arms, hugging her tightly. "Sorry we couldn't go shooting today buddy… but a run. That's the next best thing… right dad?" Andrea nodded towards Rick for confirmation and he quickly agreed, as he packed the van with the empty bags he had been carrying.

Andrea helped Carl into the back seat, going to sit with him so that she wasn't alone with Rick or Glenn, mainly just Rick. Rick, being the bastard he was (or that's what Andrea felt he was right now) slid into the back with her, muttering something quickly. "I just want to be back here for my son." Andrea rolled her eyes at his piss-poor explanation, not handling any of his bullshit as she lifted Carl and placed him in between her and Rick to avoid and contact. Rick frowned as she did so, shooting her a hurt look. She shook her head no as she went to lean on the window, Carl climbing on top of her to look out as they began driving off. She held Carl firmly so that if they made a sudden stop, he would be okay. Everything would have been okay if it wasn't for Rick moving close to her. He did it ever so slowly and gracefully that even Glenn wouldn't notice. He leaned close to her and she was suddenly all too aware of his presence as their shoulders brushed and he reached over her to point at something for Carl. He then left his arm there, and it was practically around her. She wanted to wiggle free, but that damn adorable child was in her arms, and she couldn't stand to reject him. Andrea tried remaining motionless so that she wouldn't brush Rick's shoulder or arms. Carl soon began to fall asleep as he leaned back in Andrea's arms, snuggling into the comfort of her chest again as he rested, and Andrea began to get nervous again. Andrea leaned back in the seat and shuffled her arms so that Carl was comfortable. She felt Rick's breath on the side of her face and she turned to face him. "You can back up, I've got him." Rick frowned at her words and shook his head a tiny bit, not wanting to move away from her. He lowered his head to her ear, speaking barely above a whisper as his soft lips brushed over her ear. "What if I don't want to? Andrea…" Andrea instantly clenched and backed into the window as she tried to escape Rick. Why did she pick this damn seat anyway? Oh right, to avoid him, and look where it got her. Andrea tried squirming away, but Rick moved closer until their legs touched, the electricity between them practically setting her on fire, all memory of her cramps gone. She cleared her throat uncomfortably as she wiggled and Rick looked ahead, pretending that he was doing nothing out of sorts.

The rest of the car ride very nearly remained the same, but Andrea soon relaxed, inhaling his scent to calm her nerves down. As soon as Glenn parked, she nudged Rick. "Get it moving, Grimes." Rick chuckled lightly as he exited the van, helping her out with Carl. He reached his hand over, nudging Carl awake. "Come on buddy, time to go shopping." Carl grumbled as he stood on the ground, reaching his hands up to adjust his hat. Andrea smiled warmly at that, and moved in front of Carl, rather protectively, as she began her slow trudge to the store with Glenn at her side. "Thanks for coming Glenn. Saved me from driving because Rick doesn't like to." Glenn beamed at her as they stared at the sliding doors. He slid them open with ease and entered with his knife raised, suspiciously. "Sure Andrea. Wouldn't dream of being anywhere else." Andrea grinned at that as he went to his side, and examined the room. "Clear." Andrea spoke confidently as she went to get a shopping cart, heading into the brightly lit store. Rick soon came to her side with Carl next to him as they walked inside. Andrea pushed the cart in silently, setting it aside as she nodded towards Glenn. "Wait with Carl, Glenn and I will clear it." Rick quickly shook his head, "I'm coming with you. Don't argue it." Andrea sighed as she nodded and ran off with Glenn, heading to the aisles to begin her clear. The entire effort turned out better than she suspected, and they only had to kill four walkers total in the entire store.

After the store was cleared, Andrea went back to receive her shopping cart, her empty bag already slung over her shoulder. "Let's split up and meet back here once we have full buggies." Glenn nodded and walked off, Rick watching her curiously, wondering why she would want to do so. Andrea ignored his look as she pushed off, walking to the food aisles first as to not draw suspicion. She began packing all of the cereal boxes she could find, filling her cart with any non-perishable items she could find. She heard Glenn slinking around, but she couldn't see Rick or Carl and for that, she was thankful. Andrea saw her opening, and she hurried over on her secret mission, abandoning the cart halfway as she ran to the feminine products. Andrea huffed as she took her bag off, unzipping it and running to the little pink boxes, grabbing whatever she could find. Her heart was racing at her secret shopping as she heard a man's steps round the bend. Rick stood there, clearly uncomfortable as he murmured. "Uh.. um…" Andrea's face turned beet red with humiliation as she reached for something that wouldn't be offensive. Of course, she picked up condoms and she threw them on the ground. "Just getting some uh, condoms." Andrea nearly cried out in humiliation as she quickly responded. "I mean I was looking for shampoo and…." Andrea looked around and grabbed another box containing lubricant. She nearly crumbled in that moment, pushing the box aside and grabbing thankfully, a box of toothpaste lying there. "Toothpaste!" Andrea held it up, shoving it into her bag as she hurried in the opposite direction, running into Carl who looked at the aisle. He instantly recognized the small pink boxes from Lori's days and the anger that came with the pink boxes which he assumed were the cause of her anger. He didn't understand why Andrea was so embarrassed. "You know, mom used to monsterate all the time." Andrea's blush faded as she busted out laughing at Carl's mispronunciation of menstruate. She nudged the shoulder of her tiny savior for relieving awkwardness. "Yeah, buddy. That sounds about right." Andrea laughed as she closed her bag, Rick laughing as he walked down the aisle, watching Carl and Andrea walk off. Rick let them go from his sight as he bent down and quickly slid the condoms into his bag, hurrying off behind them like he did nothing wrong. Fortunately, by the time he arrived they were talking about books again. Andrea smiled as she continued her simple conversation with Carl, walking to get her shopping cart again. She quickly grabbed the cart and hurried to the van, packing the trunk quickly as Rick came to her side and lowered his voice. "I grabbed these for you." Rick handed over aspirin, chocolate bars, and a book he found that he thought Andrea would like. Andrea smiled genuinely at him as she took his gifts, cradling them to her chest happily for a moment. Andrea smiled warmly at him, appreciatively, maybe she had found her Glenn after all.


	4. The Ride That Changed It All

Andrea was nervous after accepting Rick's gifts as if that simple action somehow sealed them together forever. She climbed quietly into the van after Rick, hoping that she could avoid all physical forms of contact with him if she sat at the end of the bench. Rick entered, and then Carl, followed by Andrea. Andrea smiled a bit as she entered after them, shutting the door as Glenn quickly drove off without a parting glance. Andrea was barely holding onto her seat as she grabbed for the chair in front of her, Rick reaching his hand to steady her. Andrea blushed at that action as she quickly pulled her hand back, sitting back on the seat as Carl reached for Andrea with one of his hands. Andrea happily took her mini savior's hand, squeezing it tightly.

Andrea smiled warmly at Carl as he soon went to lay in her lap. He murmured tiredly, "Goodnight, Andrea." Andrea smiled as she passed his hat to Rick and began stroking Carl's hair back. "Sweet dreams, sweetheart." Andrea leaned down to kiss Carl's forehead tenderly. This tiny boy made her feel like she had a purpose, made her feel happy. She couldn't help the smile at her new role in Carl's life or his in hers. She let out a content sigh and she finally realized Rick was staring again. She cleared her throat and nodded towards him. "You know, it's not nice to stare, Rick." Andrea smirked a bit as she spoke, watching him for his reaction which was surely priceless. Rick's perfectly straight teeth shined as she spoke and he stretched to try to show her his perfectly manly physique as if she didn't already know he was /built/. "Well Andrea, in my defense, I'm not used to such a beautiful woman mothering my son… It's rather distracting." Andrea rolled her eyes like she was annoyed, but her smiling lips betrayed her as she leaned to kiss Carl to hide her response. She couldn't believe he was so openly hitting on her. She lifted her head and tilted her head to him. "Rick… Do you realize you just said that outloud?" Andrea shook her head as she tried to hide her face from him, absentmindedly stroking back Carl's hair. "You don't mean that.. believe me you don't. You don't find me beautiful or distracting." Rick's face dropped as she spoke, feeling like she just stabbed him five times. "Andrea…" Rick spoke sadly, his voice dropping off. "You know that's not true…" Andrea swallowed, averting her gaze from him to avoid melting in his big brown eyes. All she could manage was a weak, "Rick…" Rick shook his head and repeated her name barely above a whisper, "Andrea…" Andrea moved her hand down to Carl's belly, hoping Rick would take it in his. Rick looked to the front worriedly as he silently moved his hand to hers, covering her hand entirely with his. Andrea found herself repeating his name as a question almost, so quiet, "Rick…?" "Andrea…." They repeated as they looked at each other, focusing their eyes on each other. Andrea couldn't handle the intimacy of the situation. She was melting under him like ice in the sun, her heart lost in his hand and eyes as she repeated his name silently and he did the same for her.

When they arrived back to the camp, Andrea was jerked awake from her reverie as if the van was the thing that made them act crazy. She quickly pulled her hand from his and looked back to Carl, shaking him awake. "Carl, honey, we're back to the camp…" A slight grumble could be heard as he sat up, rubbing his eyes. "Dad?" Rick sat forward, his gaze was still on Andrea even after she looked away. "Yes, son?" "Oh… okay…." Carl sighed with relief as he sat up and took his hat from Rick. "I was worried." Andrea sighed as she moved from the van, giving them a few moments alone as she helped Glenn unload the boxes since Rick often felt a challenge with the task. Rick soon came up to her after he sent Carl to play. "Did I ever tell you about… the man I met when this all started?" Andrea raised an eyebrow as she moved half of the items into Glenn and Maggie's car. She shook her head slightly saying, "I don't remember, why?" Rick let out a long breath and sighed, "Well I met this man.. Morgan... and well he helped me survive and learn about this new world. He headed back with his son, Duane, when I went to find Lori...I feel like now that we are almost here...and well, supplies are good… I want to go back for him while the others camp here. It would be a day or two's ride if we started now, and I was wondering if you would come with me? Mainly to protect Carl and keep me on track.." Rick rambled on and on and Andrea finally raised a hand in front of him. "I'll come. My tent's already cleaned up. I'll pack it in the van." Rick nodded as he was about to suggest the truck, but the van seemed like a better option. She walked off and called back, "Get Carl packed and we can leave in five minutes."

Andrea hurried to her belongings, packing the back of the fully stocked van with her supplies and personal belongings. She tried to focus on the task ahead, but her mind drifted to Rick… The way he looked at her and the way he held her hand as if he didn't want to let go. She found herself leaning against the van with a dozed off experience as Rick returned, packing Carl's and his bags next to her. "You okay?" Andrea nodded and her eyes finally filled with awareness of the situation as she turned to look at him. "I'm fine… Are you okay?" Rick nodded and spoke softly, "I have to be Andrea. I am the leader after all." Rick's voice carried a certain twinge of sadness, and Andrea quickly detected it. "Rick, I know you're not okay. You don't have to pretend with me. I'm not going to judge you or tell you your feelings are irrelevant because well… They're not." Rick smiled softly at her words as he moved to sit inside the van, his legs hanging down. "You can read through me like a book, huh, Harrison?" Andrea nodded and went to sit next to Rick. "Of course I can. I've known you so damn long, fought with you…. I know you. I can see that you're pained by the burden of being the leader. Everyone always expects you to have the answers, and you don't, and that's okay...because you're human." Rick smiled a bit more as she spoke, his hands in his lap. "Andrea… did anyone ever tell you that you have a way with words?" Andrea shrugged, a smile forming on her own face as well. "Did anyone ever tell you I was a damned lawyer? Of course I have a way with words." Andrea smirked playfully as Rick chuckled and shook his head. Andrea took his laugh as a signal that he was okay for the moment, and she crawled away, smiling back at him. "Go get Carl. I want to get going."

It wasn't long before the trio was loaded in the van, with very specific instructions for the camp to stay put. Abraham of course raised some hell at this, but he couldn't argue, knowing they needed Rick and Andrea to get to Washington. Andrea had of course offered to drive due to Rick's indifference to it, sliding into the driver's seat, he, the passenger seat. Carl took the back seat because he had no choice, laying across the bench tiredly. Andrea looked in her rearview mirror to check on Carl every few seconds, holding out the silence between Rick for quite some time. He was the first one to break the silence, "Andrea Harrison." Andrea laughed lightly at the way he said her name and she tilted her head to him, "Yes, officer?" Am I in trouble?" Rick chuckled lightly, shaking his head at their banter. "Well, if I say you're in trouble, will you try to bribe me?" Andrea laughed loudly now, tightening her hands on the wheel. "Hell no… You gotta give me something to be angry about." Rick kicked his foot out, laughing. "Wait a minute, what about this morning when I you know…" Andrea's face flushed bright red as she looked down. "Umm, Rick….Let's not talk about that ever again." He swallowed and fumbled with his pant leg some. "We have to someday…" "Not today." Andrea answered quickly, hoping that her words would silence him, and fortunately, it did.


	5. Survival Through a Bite

Andrea wasn't quite sure what to say to Rick as she drove, following the directions he gave. She wasn't very familiar with the area at all, being from Jacksonville, but she relied on his distractions. As nighttime fell, she looked to Rick with tired, worn eyes. "Can we stop for the night?" Rick nodded a tiny bit as he looked back to Carl who was quietly reading a book Andrea had picked out for him. Andrea quietly pulled over the van into the nearest gas station, parking in the back lot quietly. As soon as she had the car in park, she gave Rick a slight nod as she took the keys from the ignition and placed them in the glove box. She silently moved from the van, Rick doing the same as they both stretched. Andrea immediately walked to Rick's side, reaching her hands silently to fix his holster which was tilted. Rick watched her admirably, looking down. "Thank you Andrea." Andrea nodded a tiny bit, moving back to the van to open it for Carl to join them. "You okay Carl?" Carl nodded a tiny bit as he readjusted his hat, "Yeah, I'm good. Thanks Andrea." She was satisfied with his response as she looked around. "Why don't you boys get started on a very /small/ fire so I can cook us a hot meal?" Rick nodded and Carl enthusiastically ran to the back of the van, helping Andrea unpack their tent and personal items. Rick helped with the bags, helping them put together a small camp.

All three of them worked together, like a team, assembling the tent as a family almost. Andrea had to help Rick, as he had only the one hand, and locking the supports into place was a challenge. Andrea walked quietly to him as Carl quickly assembled another support. Rick had taught him well. "Hey Rick… need some help?" Rick grunted and focused on using his stump and hand to put it into place, but the fabric kept sliding from his stump, causing him to grow frustrated. Andrea shook her head at his stubbornness as she carefully reached her hands down to help him. She moved her hand under his stump, to help him as if she was his other hand, completing him, as she put her other hand over his and they worked together, closing the support. They repeated that gentle process with each other for the last two supports, and even after, Andrea's hands remained on him. She couldn't find the need or want to let go. She found herself looking back up to him, but he of course was already watching her. "Rick Grimes…." "Andrea Harrison…"

They continued openly staring at each other for quite sometime, their hands still on each other's, holding them. Carl was on the other side of the tent, and Rick and Andrea were nearest the van. They were so entirely enveloped in each other that they didn't even hear the approach of the four men coming. Andrea was just leaning up to /kiss/ Rick when she felt the cool end of a gun pressed against the tender skin of her neck. "Move, bitch or I'll pop one in the boy and man right now." Andrea froze as she dropped her hands from Rick, trying to move her hand to her waist for her knife, but the man beat her. The man immediately snatched her knife, tossing it aside as he let out a low, throaty chuckle. "Nice try blondie." Andrea could feel the heat of his breath against her neck, and it gave her chills. "Now, move."

Andrea felt a sudden fear set in as one of the other men pulled Rick away from her, dragging him back to the van. She frantically looked around for Carl, and another man had him, behind the tent. He was screaming for Rick and Andrea, the sound piercing straight through to her bones. "Rick…." Andrea panted softly from her fear as she looked to him, but he was in the same state, his python and hatchet tossed to the side. He even was in a worse situation seeing as he only has one hand. Andrea quickly scanned the area for a weapon, her heart sinking as she realized how screwed she was.

Rick's muscles tensed underneath the man's hands as he watched the other man bring Carl out front so that Rick could surely see him and also Andrea. Carl was okay, but crying out as he pushed against the man, whereas Rick and Andrea were tied up...and plotting. The leader of the group who seemingly enough captured Rick spoke up. "Yer going to give us all of yer shit….and then..we'll have the girl...followed by the boy….. and you'll watch. We'll make sure to kill ye' last, you wouldn't want to miss the show." Rick let out a very audible growl at what the men were saying, his head ringing with possibilities as the other man standing aside made his walk to Andrea, a devious grin on his face. "She's eh pretty one. Scar and all. That scar makes 'er sexy." He chortled loudly, stroking back Andrea's bright blonde hair as she pulled back into the other man, debating her plan of action.

Why was Rick doing nothing? Andrea panted as she squirmed, the one man's hands beginning to roam her body, gripping her as he felt pleased like she was a piece of meat. "Rick…." Andrea practically begged him to do something as he leaned back in shock, unsure of what to do. Andrea had never felt this plaguing feeling, but she did now, panic consuming her limbs.

The other man with Carl had his arms around him, "Don't you worry, kid. It'll be over soon." He was making no move as he held Carl, pressing the boy firmly on his groin as the other two men assaulted Andrea. The one behind her was moving his hands into the top of her pants and that's when she began to squirm, not willing to let them /gang rape her/. She jerked away, but the other man held her firm, his hands encircling his breasts. She banged into him and he growled, tightening his hold. "What the fuck did I say?" He moved his arms around her in a sweeping motion and plastered her onto the ground, the man behind her forced away.

She squirmed and fought as the angry man began touching her again, but she was just /letting/ them for the sole reason of protecting Carl. Andrea figured if she obliged, Carl might have a chance at escaping. She growled lowly as the men lifted her shirt, exposing her upper half. This set her off, but she didn't have the motivation yet. She saw Rick's expression, a deadly and dangerous one, and she knew their window would be soon. As soon as she saw the man by Carl unbutton his pants, she lost her mind. She saw their actions, and felt the adrenaline and protection for Carl coming out. "Get the fuck away from him!" Andrea growled and nodded towards Rick letting him know it was time to act.

That was all it took for Rick to set his plan into motion. The other man's arms were now loosely around him, and he had the upper hand. He growled and turned his bared teeth back in an animalistic fashion, edging towards the man's jugular as he ripped it out with his bare teeth, the blood flying everywhere. Andrea saw this and she felt one of the man's hands descending to her pants again. She screamed as she thrusted her knees up into him, taking him by surprise and kicking him back, hard. The other man tightened his hold on her and sent a punch soaring across her jaw. Andrea bit back the whimper, but she quickly recovered while he punched, her left hand free. She curled up her fist and sent a hard punch into his jaw, quickly shuffling to her feet. She growled as she kicked him hard in the face. She heard the jaw, causing it to break just from impact. Andrea took the window to go retrieve her knife, but the other man grabbed her from behind. She couldn't even remain still for a second as she yanked her arms free and quickly flipped around, stabbing the knife hard into the man's abdomen. She pulled it away and moved the knife to his heart, stabbing him three times until the other man returned, grabbing her around the waist. She screamed as she retracted the knife from the one man and dug it into the new man's arm, cutting straight down to the bone as he fell back.

Andrea couldn't control her primeval actions either as she returned to the man and stabbed him seven times. Watching him bleed gave her a rush. She had brutally killed both of the men, and for once she had no regrets as she stood, panting, ready to do more damage, but Carl's voice brought her back…and he was crying. "Andrea?" That of course broke her from her psychotic reverie as she ran back to him and picked him up. Rick was still stabbing the man who had assaulted Carl, a terrifying look in his eyes. Andrea tried to hide Carl from seeing that as she held him close. "C-Carl? Are you okay?" He trembled in her arms as he cried, clinging to Andrea like she was his only lifeline. "I'm here.." She repeated to Carl over and over again as she rocked him in her arms, stroking back his hair.

She still hadn't put her shirt on as holding Carl was her priority. It wasn't until Rick had returned to them, blood dripping down his chin still as he wrapped his arms tightly around them, holding them closely to him for more time than any of them cared to admit. It wasn't until Carl squirmed that Andrea loosened her hold and passed him to Rick, walking back to retrieve her shirt. She pulled it on quickly, walking back to the boys. "We should sleep in the van tonight...not the tent." Rick nodded a tiny bit as he watched her guiltily, feeling like everything that happened was his fault. "Let's just stay in the tent… No one will bother us." Andrea nodded again as she moved back to the tent, quietly setting out sleeping things for them.

Carl was already asleep by the time Andrea had finished her scan of the area. Rick was still laying with Carl, his arm protectively around him as Andrea double checked for safety again. By the time she returned to the tent, and saw Rick's face, she knew it would be a long night, and for that, she was absolutely terrified.


	6. You Save Me

"Rick I…." Andrea muttered some, not quite sure what to say. She wasn't exactly the most eloquent person around despite her history as a lawyer. The thing about being a lawyer for Andrea all had to do with a front. Andrea hid behind that false confidence, used it to make things easier when fighting for her cases. Defending people that she sure well knew were criminals was certainly not an easy task, but Andrea did it. She wasn't quite sure why, considering the fact that she was well off already. She seemed to think that it maybe resulted from the need to please her father as well. That would make sense seeing that was the reason she became a lawyer after all, solely to please her father. She quickly attempted to snap out of her phase, looking down to Rick.

It seemed she had been dwelling anyways as Rick was staring at her, watching her intently with blank, scary eyes. She kneeled down next to Rick, instead of Carl, moving behind his back. Andrea hesitantly reached a hand to Rick's back, and she instantly felt his muscles tense beneath her tiny, capable hands. She spoke up quietly, not wanting to disturb Carl who had literally cried himself to sleep. "When this all started, I never thought I had a chance….It was Amy and I on a road trip and well….That was that. We were stuck with a broken down car, and not a shit of a clue in what to do and Dale saved us…. He saved us and we came to Atlanta….And then…..Shane saved us. He helped teach me to shoot and how to protect Amy a-and when she passed away…./You saved me./"

Rick listened intently to her, trying to understand every word she was saying, but for some reason he couldn't focus. His mind was elsewhere, thinking back to Andrea's assault and almost rape along with Carl's. He just /watched/, frozen in fear. He couldn't save them. Rick let those men touch Andrea. He was a /monster/ for letting her be violated. Andrea slowly began rubbing her hands on Rick's back as the silence carried out, gently, waiting for him to respond. The action surprisingly calmed Rick, and Andrea could feel his muscles relax, causing her to sigh with relief. She suddenly felt it necessary to repeat and expand her words.

"Y-you saved me...You told me I didn't have a reason to quit….Even then, you told me about this dream of yours to make a better place, a-and for once I listened…. Rick Grimes...Don't you dare for a second think that you have done nothing for me. You have saved me more times than I can count, and for that, I will be forever faithful and thankful. You even saved me tonight…." Andrea trailed off and Rick's muscles instantly clenched again at her final words, causing Andrea to pull back her hand in fear.

Rick trembled some now, turning his head back to look at Andrea, his eyes cold and vacant, longing for the support she offered despite his unwillingness to understand it. Rick spoke soft, broken almost, "A-Andrea...How can you even say that? You almost got raped today and...and I was watching….I sat there….I watched them take your shirt off and grope your body...I-I-I….." Rick's voice becomes panicked almost, coated with a certain twinge of pain at the idea. His breath picked up as he let go of Carl to back away onto his back in an attempt to roll away from his anxiety. Upon rolling, he knocked into Andrea's legs and the force took her by surprise, causing her to fall back on her butt.

She tried to mute her reaction, reaching for Rick to help her up, and fortunately he did. As soon as he did, Andrea interlocked her fingers tightly with his and moved to lay down next to him, just to be closer. Her voice even dropped quieter as they were now closer to each other. "All I remember from tonight is you protecting Carl and I….We are both fine. Your little boy is right next to you, and I am right here. Rick… I'm right here." Andrea reached her free hand up to stroke his cheekbones as she rolled onto her side, moving closer to Rick in the process. Their bodies still remained a few inches away, but she could feel Rick's body heat, drawing her to him. She stared at him carefully for a moment, waiting for Rick to respond, his body trembling again. The entire idea of Rick trembling made Andrea sick, and she silently moved her body to his until every part of them touched. Their fingers remained interlocked and she silently stared into Rick's beautiful eyes, having a word or two with him through that contact.

Rick eventually gathered enough courage to reply. "A-Andrea…..Why don't you….See me for the monster I really am? I r-ripped out a man's throat with my bare teeth….I let them touch you… I couldn't think...I couldn't act. I p-panicked...You...You could have….I could have seen…." Andrea couldn't take his hopeless, broken murmur anymore. She pulled her hand from his to slide her arm around him, hugging him to her as she buried her face in his chest.

"Like I said before Rick...you /save me/...You are no /monster/. You are a kind, strong man… You are so smart and so loving…..You give me hope for this new world….Please don't think about the old world. Okay? And as far as what could have happened, that's exactly what /could have happened/, like you said. But it didn't. It didn't happen, so don't dwell on some imaginary failures that you had nothing to do with. Think about what you did do….You saved me and I'm here now in your arms… So please stop… We're here...Carl is here….We're together and that's all that matters….The three of us being safe." Andrea slowly trailed off, waiting for Rick to respond, but he couldn't.

Instead of responding with words, he moved his arms around her silently, holding her tiny frame to his. The action made him feel safe and warm, like they could conquer anything. He felt Andrea's hand rubbing his lower back, and he instantly relaxed against her as she moved her head into the crook of his neck, nuzzling him affectionately. The entire interaction was making him lose a grip on reality as he slowly fell into a peaceful state in which he had never experienced before. They remained together, motionless, frozen, clutched in each other's arms.

It had to be at least an hour of them clutching each other before Rick attempted to speak again. He knew Andrea was still awake, as her tiny hand was still rubbing his back, knowing exactly what he would need. "Andrea….thank you….." She nodded a tiny bit, tempted to kiss his neck in thanks. Instead she just closed her eyes, finally giving into Rick, resting with him as she spoke up. "It's nothing...We should sleep now. Things are different now...We can sleep." Andrea mumbled tiredly into the skin of his neck as Rick closed his eyes, almost falling asleep instantly at her words as if she was giving him permission to give into his human desires, sleep consuming his body as he murmured one last "goodnight".


End file.
